Just go.....

2007-10-08T10:30:00.000-07:00

ex-park I

MARGARITA

4 Islands

4 Seashells

a Caribbean Island cocktail

unlike any other…

Potential escapee from Mars?

. i.e. one of our uncounted war-zones?

No need to live in or near down town Baghdad, Gaza or Kabul to qualify. As a resident of any urban area these days there could be reasons a-plenty to at least examine the options for removal of self and possibly immediate family as far away as feasible from the undeclared and not-entirely-declared wars a society-gone-cabbage* has us suffer. *Prefer to leave those delicious *bananas where they belong, in your tropical fruit salad…

No rotating Globe on your desk nor a large enough Map of the World in a drawer? Then, as step 1: - I suggest including your local book shop on this week’s ‘to-do’ list.
Step 2: - Spin the Earth for her worth and wherever your index finger points as she stops, is where you may decide destiny lies; or you can just pin the Map to your barn door and throw a dart or two….
People have gone about trying to fulfill their desire to escape in just such fashion. On today’s Planet Earth it may not however be the most practical way to achieve one’s dream. Apart from the risk of landing in the midst of yet another urban sprawl with 40 million polluting vehicles, (where a deep carbon-monoxidated breath may require a pronto visit to the nearest emergency clinic's oxygen tent) - there are other minor impracticalities to consider. What happens if you randomly pick an area of major strategic interest to an enemy?

The latter list could be sizable, such is today's world - and include the local pawn shop, friendly neighborhood bank, tax-office (oho), City Hall, possibly even McDonut's & Co-Emulators! (Explicable, for feeding the world such good-tasting junk).…Reluctantly, I also suggest you consider excluding escape to splendid isolation in a Rain forest, or any other forest. Of the few wooded areas left, most are in a process of enthusiastic depredation by men and men-made conditions, as anyone can easily verify on the evening news, wherever!

An understandable urge to move to the remotest place on the planet, may leave us with a seemingly simple choice between two Poles. No, not cramming-it with the good folks in Warsaw or Krakow, but to our North & South Polar regions. Tempting thought, – so close to Santa in a vast, sparsely populated expanse with apparent clean air and water, the seductive notion of three-sleigh garages, all-year-round snow-men & hopefully snow-Ladies, plus loving Huskies craving your attention! A diet healthy enough to beat the pants off most others, including the South Beach, but surely not the Mediterranean (not much red wine is grown by the Inuit, though as a hitherto ignored & perhaps singular positive spin-off courtesy, Climate Change this may also change..'Arctic Beaujolais' 2027 - who knows, might become quite the vintage...?)!

Why don’t more people move North, or South?

Other than the as yet unresolved heating dilemma during 11.99 months of the year, there are a few additional impracticalities to consider, including the depressing fact our Poles also suffer contamination and melt-down. Try getting a mortgage for a (dissolving) piece of real estate on a floating glacier…& never mind the recent melt-down among considered Rock-solid lenders....(as of late '08, try getting a mortgage a n y w h e r e!).

So where on Earth can one escape to?

Studying a web-site promoting escapes, reading about others’ experiences beats throwing darts or making random choices, so at least I hope you're on the right track.

With the pressure on my chest somewhat lighter, I'd better apologize for all the preamble, & let's get us into turquoise waters at long last (sigh of relief & Prozac where it belongs....). Fortunately there are still a few places on our planet where life can be joyful and healthy, where some blissful conditions do exist, at least when compared to our war-zones..

After 21 years on a Caribbean island, I feel reasonably qualified and humbly educated enough to publish my personal check-list with those conditions I believe should be present for successful living in this area. Some will be equally applicable when considering other island communities or places by the sea.

In order of importance (to me personally) then: (Further analysis of each item follows list!).

VALUE! (On account of 'current realities', this needs to be first!) No need to tell everyone! Margarita IS (still) (just) affordable!

GOOD PEOPLE! Mostly! - friendly, good nature'd, kind, smiling people! OK, you can get smiles in war-zones; but for free…??
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BAD PEOPLE! They're also here, or it wouldn't be planet Earth one supposes. Some are locals, others are from 'wherever'. Just like the driftwood you'll encounter on the seashore - some pristine, even after a year in the ocean - some rotten to the core. Until you truly know your way about, just be very, very careful about who you trust. I can't over-emphasise the value of truly understanding local realities. There are more than a few horror stories including local lawyers working in cohoots with foreign con-artists. Ask your Embassy or Consulate for a list of recommended Law firms before giving anyone a Power of Attorney!!! Also BEWARE of 'friendly locals' who chat you up speaking good English, German, French, Dutch or Swahili- at beaches, shopping malls, popular tourist hideouts etc, - even when in the company of an ex-pat !! Refuse invitations for a 'Free Island Tour', 'free Anything' including a free meeting of their granny at home (their home!).

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FRIENDS! Real, true friendships are as or more important than love – in fact they are love, without the other bit!

SUPPORT SYSTEM! A reliable network of people you can trust locally. This can be the key to a successful, happy move! It can take a while to get it in place, some reverses seem to be inevitable, but do persevere!!

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CLIMATE! Sunshine! Clear skies most days & nights, pleasant breezes!

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WEATHER! No extremes, nor hot nor cold, nor in regular hurricane-muscle-flexing-areas!

I don’t recommend investing your life’s savings too close to a gym where the Hurricanes regularly work out!

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GEOGRAPHICAL STABILITY! As far as possible I like to sleep well at night, prefer a bed to a trampoline; avoid known seismic hot spots, tsunami & volcanic regions, potential mud-slides & avalanches - oh, also purple scorpions & hungry Anaconda! Who but Tarzan (remember him?) would pick such a neighborhood!?

PERSONAL SAFETY & SECURITY! But of course one tries to avoid crime-ridden areas, drugs & related trafficking! The problem is Crime tries to find you! Its not always easy to obtain reliable data! But as far as possible check local crime statistics, read local publications, case the joint! Live in an as secure as possible environment – unless prone to Russian-type Roulette of course!

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HEALTH SERVICES! Check on the level of professional health services available locally. One may need a little more than a Pepto cure on occasion!

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AIR, WATER, FOOD! The better the air & water quality, the healthier you’ll be & remain. Same goes for the fresher & less contaminated the food supply!

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POLITICAL & MONETARY STABILITY! Would Rambo, or even Schwarzy (25 years ago!) choose living in a Parador-type society with mad, rampant revolutions every six months? Not unless the Studio made a serious enough contribution. Fair enough! A Revolution now & then’s OK, hopefully one that looks & sounds like Carnival in Rio. Currencies can be of less concern, unless zipper inflation rages, Zimbabwe style. You’ll keep your hard-earned cash in Fort Knox, The Bank of the Russian or British Empire, down town Tokyo, up-town Frankfurt, mid-town Zurich or wherever 'secure'* anyhow, correct? Right! *Secure would appear to have become a somewhat subjective concept of late; so well, just give it your best shot!

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COMMUNICATIONS! I say, the better, the better! Easy come, easy go..but who would want to? 'Go', I mean! Then there’s the Internet (thank goodness!), even for Banking…

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THE LAW! I prefer to feel protected to a degree, with a reasonably dependable legal system, in preference to where the Judiciary wear T-shirts and Buttons with the highly ambiguous slogan ..

‘support your local Judge - my Credit Suisse a/c is on my website' http://www.flexiblejusticedotcom%28e-on%29/ ….

Escaping from a war-zone (Mars) usually implies being a trifle bored with deceit & treachery, police-hide'n seek games of all types, Martian (IN)-justice Systems, Cayman-type Lawyers high on litigation fees (Legal-process junkies), Radar-speed-traps, shaker-sirens, Hollywood-type chases, suspicious looks via black-reflective sunglasses (the evil eyes), aggressive outfits & ludicrous paraphernalia, parking tickets, wheel clamps, tow-away fines, step-on-the-lawn-fines, cross-the-road-at-the-wrong-place-fines, step-on-my-toe-fines, doggie-turd-fines, CCCCCCCCs, Big Brother’ Data-Suction Services, Rainbow Terror Alerts, Swat, Squat, Sweat & Whatever- Teams declaring WW116 on a neighborhood, 24-hour sirens....you know what I mean!! It also implies respect for local Laws and traditions!!

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TAXES! I love paying taxes to governments who use their citizens’ cash on happy-future investments like Wars, Nookes & unending BureaucraZies - don’t you also? So what am I doing on a tax-free island? (To be absolutely correct I should say: Sales-tax-free!) As for off-shore tax-havens - I think not! There's something about the people who frequent such places & the general ambiente that doesn't appeal....want to know more?

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ISLAND BEAUTY! (& beauties!!) If one can also live in great natural surroundings, find long, wide, uncrowded sandy beaches with a Miss Venezuela splashing crystalline warm ocean water at me, I certainly won’t complain!

ISLAND EXPLORATION! An island does need a certain geographical size as well as points of interest (mountains or hills) for exploration to provide variety & stimulate curiosity.

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HISTORY! If present, provides cultural interest & traditions, such as architecture, Forts, Castles, Museums, sunken Galleons, rich food variety & local pride!

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MODERN LIFE! There are elements of contemporary life I would prefer to have available, to take & to leave as required, not to be ever-present, but it’s good to know they’re there.

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A PROJECT! Having owned a sail boat, having sailed, been a beach-bum (OK, just for about a month a year, so not really the bona fide, genuine, aromatic sort), enjoyed the rum & the calypso somewhat, but I really needed a project & a place where projects are possible.

……..And thus it came to pass..The prevailing Winds brought me to these shores in ’88 and here I still am, reasonably content and reasonably healthy, I pray!

MARGARITA ISLAND (Isla Margarita) An island where you can still find yourself, health & happiness! Not for everyone! Just as well! Margarita needs to be understood & to understand you. Once that happens, there's perhaps no better place on Earth!

Just 25 kms off the northern coast of Venezuela, a large, Spanish-speaking, oil-producing country in South America. There is more than enough data available on the Web for me to repeat much of that here. Do conduct your own in-depth research. I’ll limit my story to those salient elements which interested me and may help when planning a move or looking for smart choices. Being part of a large, modern country has both advantages and the opposite. Among the pluses are Culture, the availability of merchandise, building materials, skilled & unskilled labor, comparatively (compared to most other Carib islands!) low building costs, fresh food & fruit from the mainland, an interesting country to explore (not just the Amazon & the Andes regions), modern communications, ferries, airlines & those advantages a modern economy can offer.
The minuses mostly gravitate around the popularity the island enjoys among Mainlanders, especially during vacation periods…..more are also moving to live here permanently, adding pressures to local services, such as garbage collection (collection?!). Vacation time is the time when locals escape to other nearby islands, such as Coche, or to the other half of Margarita, the peninsula of Macanao. The important point is there are escapes, easy and pleasant ones, even from here. If you have your own boat, so much the better – there are inhabited and solitary islands nearby, or if it pleases, the entire Caribbean…

Back to details - more about:

VALUE: If you can afford to pay $200 for an average meal without blinking; if you don’t even bother to read your tab for a $1000 dinner, terrific for you! Although I’d like to mention how some of the nicest folks I’ve met here are precisely those you’d be unlikely to share a table with in St.Cripes.

Assuming you’re not Bill G., did not move your savings into Micros stock (200 years ago!), nor a recent Powerball winner, you may find $2.5 million Condo-Castles a shade beyond your immediate reach, although that could change.....Margarita is a more 'down to earth' place. Although some hotels claim a '5-Star' rating, frankly I see them more like 'shooting stars', or perhaps one or two may have drifted into another Galaxy. Whatever the true Star-tally locally, it is usually more than compensated for by genuinely friendly staff. On the other end of the spectrum, I know of one Hotel in a St.Cripes-type island, which prides itself on 'flying in the genuine ingredients' for their 'authentic antique Bouillabaisse' from France every week.....& you can pay over €2k (that's over $3 000) per night for the privilege. On this island you can get a healthy, delicious fresh 'fish-soup' for €5 ($7.5)! Up to you.....& you may feel better here about your 'Carbon Footprint' to boot.
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CARBON FOOTPRINTS: I'll shamefully confess to once leaving Yeti-size footprints (presumably they're pretty large!?) in my travels about the planet. Glad to say they're now down to about Sandpiper size & that's another thing I like about living here. One would need to make a serious effort, a truly ridiculous effort - to maintain one's carbon footprint of a similar size as on Mars. Nonetheless quite a few folks manage to do just that! Holy ignorance forever....

PEOPLE: Margariteños* are the BEST! Their origins - the local GUAIQUERÌ indigenous population, by all accounts a placid, friendly bunch, (far nicer than those war-mongering Caribe’s on nearby islands..) - forced to dive their hearts out by the conquistadors, ‘cause Margarita, Coche & Cubagua had great oyster beds with some of the world’s finest pearls**. Unfortunate Guaiquerì! All that suffering just to keep their Majesties in España content…
As time passed, beyond 1493, Margarita was settled mainly by folks from the Andalusia region of Spain, also usually a happy crowd, and today the result is a cocktail of friendly, helpful people who’ll go out of their way to make visitors feel welcome. * You'll need to learn to differentiate between local islanders, Margariteños, & 'local' Venezuelans from the mainland, known on the island as 'navegados' (navigators or better, 'arrivals by sea'). Although most Venezuelans are truly special people, the islanders are even more so.

I RECOMMEND: Make the effort! Learn & speak proper Spanish! If not already proficient prior to moving, do so on the island. There are some pretty good language schools. It also helps to try to blend-in with local culture, try not to run around like a Martian. Venezuelans love their beaches,(I only wish more of them would take their refuse with them after a day's enjoyment!) - they love to party & drink Scotch, but they’ll dress elegantly for shopping, dining & a concert! Make local friends; integrate; if you'll only have ex-pat friends, why leave home? You’ll never learn the language!

FRIENDS: Perhaps I’ve been especially fortunate, having made better friends here, among locals than anywhere else. Hopefully others have or will be just as lucky. I mean true friends, people who care, and who’ll assist in times of need - on Mars people are 'friends' as long as there is an advantage in the friendship for them. The day one has a need, is the day they put out the 'gone fishing (on Mercury)' sign. Of course there are exceptions & I have also had the privilege to meet some !! Another refreshing element is the almost-absence of hypocritical righteousness in local culture. This, predominantly 'other-world' characteristic as typified in 'The Witches of Salem', & practiced on a daily basis even today by Marsian leadership & much of society, complicates life still further on that planet & can usually be locally encountered only where some ex-Marsians re-group, & where a little contamination has taken place affecting a few locals (not likely to be islanders!) who for reasons best known to themselves, seem to share an admiration for Marsian culture, even identify with it....Incredible, but it does occur.
If you're serious about escaping 'Life' on Mars, take a detour.....& with a little luck you'll never even come across one. On the other hand, I can't think of any inhabited place on Earth totally free of sewer-rats - I mean not entirely free....and Margarita is no exception!

SUPPORT SYSTEM: A vital ingredient for a successful life anywhere! The value of this ingredient cannot be over-emphasized!! Real-Estate sales people usually (naturally) focus on the one element of interest to them...How best to sell you their particular piece of property with or without bricks & cement, i.e. plot, house, apartment, condo - whatever. As a newcomer to the island you probably wont have much of an idea about 'neighborhoods', 'vulnerability' etc. You're probably dazed or blinded by that wonderful ocean view & I don't blame you, but once you move in & reality comes a-knocking on your door, hopefully you wont regret not having conducted a little deeper investigation into your 'neighborhood'. When I first moved to Venezuela, many years ago, it was with my Venezuelan wife who I married in London. She & her family provided the kind of 'know-how' which I am sure avoided many a pitfall - until eventually I learned to speak Spanish properly & learned the 'lay of the land' myself. When moving to a country far from your own, with probably very different traditions & methods, it is a good idea to obtain reliable data & connect well. Over time get a circle of supportive people you can trust, don't be a hermit! You'll need to include local people. Venezuelan society is often 'tribal', i.e. family oriented & mutually supportive, a very good system! Everyone has a cousin, who has another cousin, who has a close friend, who is a pal of someone able to solve a problem...& often that sort of relationship can solve a complicated jig-saw!

CLIMATE: Average island temperature (year-round) is 28 Centigrade! A pleasant Trade Wind breeze discernible almost permanently, not usually an invasive breeze, as in some islands where a constant howl becomes a chronic pain. Neither will you experience the levels of humidity found in many islands, where to get undressed (& dressed) may require a 911 call. Imagine that situation on a hot date (with your wife/husband!)…. The warmest months here are July-October, but global warming is beginning to affect Margarita. Still, I see temperatures here in July-August degrees below those in Europe & North America!!

WEATHER: Mostly, incredibly wonderful! It does rain, (thank goodness!) no monsoons, in November-December, with a few rainy days at the beginning of January. Also, with luck during June, July & August, but its tropical rain, warm rain. Often it will rain during the night & you’ll wake up to a magical aroma of rich moist soil plus brilliant sunlight.

HURRICANES: Take the Hurricane season seriously! It should be of serious interest & concern for anyone planning to spend time or invest in this area. From June to October it affects the entire Caribbean region plus Mexico, but even the US all the way to Canada at times. Margarita lies south of the regular storm patterns. Since I moved here, we have seen some storms pass within a 100kms or so, we’ve had serious rain & stormy conditions, but never a direct hit or such closeness as to warrant extra-special precautions. It could happen of course, the entire planet is experiencing upheavals related to human activity, but our location appears to benefit us in that regard. The U.S. Government provides an excellent service via NOAA's NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTER, check regularly for unusual or potentially dangerous weather at: http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/ & avoid being caught out by a storm with your pants down!

GEOGRAPHICAL STABILITY: Other than local politics, there is no Vesuvius-type activity close-by I am aware of. As for mud-slides, our mountains are well covered with vegetation, protected from deforestation by local Laws & in any event we haven’t seen that kind of rain it takes to provoke slides such as one sees in Haiti and other islands, aggravated by deforestation.

PERSONAL SAFETY & SECURITY: An ever more poignant subject this, world-wide! Who, when escaping one war-zone wants to move to another? Yet it happens, especially when one doesn’t do one’s homework. There’s crime even in the Vatican I am told, also on the high seas. To escape it completely is probably Utopian, or one may need to join the ISS, and who knows what goes on there. This island is no exception, it has its share, some serious, most not as... I urge everyone who values their peace, privacy & the safety of their family as well as their own to read the James Bond story on 'Caribbean Life'. CARIBBEAN LIFE IV can be sent on-line for just $20.- (see end of blog!). If you think $20 is 'too much' for someone's decades of local know-how, then by all means enjoy the 'Roulette'.....

Thieves, here at any rate, tend to look for an easy target. The secret then is not to become one, i.e. be a difficult target, not flaunting wealth, not advertising valuables. There’s no need to anyhow on a Caribbean Island such as this. People here are more likely to judge you by your cheerful, generous personality than by your decor, the reverse of how it works on Mars. Another reason for blending in with local culture, like the iguana. I have quite a few in the garden, but hardly ever see one….All in all, Margarita is fairly* safe, especially if you know your way around & adopt the iguana’s technique. (*Perhaps there is a more appropriate definition, but I can't readily come up with one. Having lived here for over 20 years with only one incident of BREAK-IN to report, I can only say that I feel fairly secure, but do take reasonable protective precautions & 'reasonable precautions' are the result of understanding HOW things work here!!!....which however are only a fraction of the security measures I felt were needed when living on Mars!!).
SECURITY UPDATE FEB.2010: Sadly, crime statistics for Venezuela have continued to climb and that includes this island. Although the vast majority of incidents are among local drug peddlers; visitors and residents have also become targets. 2008-2009 were bad years in that sense. Since late 2009 however, new police and military efforts to control the rampant crime scene are beginning to bring positive results. One can only hope and pray such efforts will continue, improve and make Margarita once more an island where one can feel secure and enjoy life without the worry of violence and burglary!

LOCAL LAWS & REGULATIONS: 'CocoNUTS'!! The only way to avoid unpleasant (& expensive) experiences with authorities is to have all your documentation in order! And the only way to achieve that is by either speaking Spanish as 'they' do, knowing your way about, (as they do) , having a huge reservoir of patience & determination & limitless time available to invest in often totally nonsensical chases for 'Rubber Stamps'. The other way is get someone reliable & 'in the know' to guide you through the mazes & the accent needs to be on reliable!! That goes for Transient or Resident visas, Driver Licenses, Health Certificates, Building permits, Tax declarations, Vehicle documents etc; in fact any & all documents for Venezuela. Tourist visas are valid for a 90 day period only & one would need to depart & return for another period. The Law says that as a Tourist you cannot conduct business nor invest in Real Estate here! A good many visitors listen to poor advice from ex-pats who seem to have become adept at ignoring local Laws. My suggestion is: Abide by the Laws! Those 'wise guys' who may laugh at legal requirements will eventually come unstuck & pay the price! Venezuela is NOT (I think) a Banana Republic! It's Laws & Regulations are there for a reason, (one assumes) even if much of it seems superfluous or absurd. .My recommendation: If you're interested in moving to the island, investing here or conducting business, write a note to James Bond, a long-time Resident who will provide honest answers & deal with your issues in an objective manner & with no specific sales agenda to bias his advice!! He offers a SERVICE which he calls 008 BANANA PEEL INSURANCE....

HEALTH SERVICES: Not bad! There’s no shortage of Doctors, Dentists and all manner of Alternative Practitioners. In recent years, the Government has invited Cuban Doctors as well, they offer free medical treatment in various ‘Ambulatorios’ around the island & my own experience with them has been positive, as well as with regular private medicine. If you have insurance, fine – but you can also obtain coverage locally at fair rates. Medical & Dental treatment costs are by far and away considerably less than anywhere ! Living well here should benefit your health and the object obviously is to remain in good shape, but if something ever does go wrong, one can assume to be in good hands.

AIR, WATER, FOOD: Not too much to be said in these departments, the air is as clean as it can be with breezes coming off the ocean all the way from Africa. The nearest industrial zone of any size might be somewhere in southern Brazil, thousands of miles away. Venezuela is one of the few truly blessed countries left on the planet, with a population comparable to that of Mexico City (for the entire country) and some of the world’s great rivers on its territory, there could hardly be a fresh water shortage. As for food - fresh produce comes across from the mainland every day, there’s fresh fish a-plenty and at still very accessible prices. Venezuelan cuisine is interesting, tasty & healthy, if you know what to avoid. Inexpensive, but good wines are imported from Argentina, Chile & there are some Venezuelan wines. Beer & Rum are too cheap, so beware!

When I see people promoting a place on the basis of just how cheap the booze is, I wonder who they're trying to appeal to? AA does not have the presence it should in this area! I find that less than responsible! Are gallons of Rum supposed to be sold at your local island GNC?? Excuse the detour....but why not promote Papaya juice instead of Cirrhosis!?

If you’re enjoying a grouper-steak at $150 a serving on St.Cripes, chances are it, the Grouper, originated around here, where you’d be paying $50 for it.

POLITICAL & MONETARY STABILITY: My advice to foreigners is - best remain on the sidelines of political debate & just enjoy this beautiful country. Here on the island, folks of opposite persuasions sit around the Dominoes tables on a Saturday afternoon and enjoy a beer, & with that I hope to have told you an awful lot!!

The Bolivar Fuerte (or Strong Bolivar) BsF, is now in effect. The current legal exchange rates are BsF.2,15 = US$1. & BsF4,30, depending on the type of rate - transaction ration! Presently there are Exchange Controls, hence I would advise to change not too much above expected short-term requirements at any one time.

Upon arrival you may be confronted by currency-touts, cab drivers & others offering exchange rates over & beyond the official rate. My advice: Don't even think about it! You would be breaking the Law, which is not a good way to begin your vacation or life on the island; you would also expose yourself to all manner of criminal elements with possibly incalculable results. If you do, and something goes wrong - who would you complain to? The Police may well charge you with an offense while some smart-Alec is enjoying your $s, €s or Shekels...!

Greed is a condition not exempt of risks...you have been warned....
Furthermore, I object to websites allowing visitors to promote black-market, i.e. illicit exchange options!! The only motivation for which is good-old-fashioned greed! (Martian style)! Why does is appear to be 'OK' for some, to encourage a criminal act in a country one visits as a tourist, but would refrain from at home?? Or do they indeed refrain from illegal acts at home? I imagine a website promoting a criminal activity on Mars may well bring a swift response from Martian law enforcement...& yet, otherwise laudable sites like Trip Advisor publish mail from people who recommend breaking the law here. Another example of Martian double-standards...

COMMUNICATIONS: Flights to & from Margarita & Caracas (Maiquetia) are a-plenty, as well as other national destinations. From Europe there are a number of services directly to the island, also good international connections via Caracas to the US & world-wide. Ferry services operate daily to the mainland, even several times per week to La Guaira, the port city for Caracas or another way to reach the International Airport at Maiquetia. So there’s no need to ever feel claustrophobic here. Going somewhere is not difficult, but would one want to?!
The island’s highways & byways are better than most other islands’, simple as that! Gasoline is (obscenely) cheap & there are local car dealerships for just about every major make. Traffic has been on the increase of late, since more people visit or move here, so we’re beginning to see the occasional traffic jam, prompting me to get on my Chinese scooter & reach civilization within all of 8 minutes from my remote spot….
Phone & Internet as well as Satellite TV services are of international standard. One can live in both worlds here, or in one or the other.

THE LAW: I was never too thrilled with the concept of Wyatt Earp hiding behind a bush with a radar device or sneaking up to declare WW4 with flashing lights, wailing sirens & Six-shooter-at-the-ready, Boot Hill style.

Then there’s The War on Terror to escape from! Who needs political slogans on a Caribbean island…?! In any event, I do believe more & more people are becoming aware of who the true Terrorists are. So what's needed is a War on Insanity! Care to join?
To the best of my knowledge and experience, you’ll never have a problem with the Law as long as you stay clear of the obvious pitfalls in any environment, and I don't need to tell you what they are, or do I?

Here, you can & should be whatever pleases you (with the aforementioned in mind). Be the sole CEO of your own time & life! Speeding doesn’t make any sense on an island where the furthest distance is less than 60miles or 100kms. For that matter, why buy a Bimmer?? If the cops stop you, usually only at checkpoints where they’ll request your ID & vehicle documents, but for whatever reason, smile! It’s a Caribbean island remember – a smile is your passport to successful living, quite apart from having your documentation in order. Whatever happens, never lose your cool, there’s always a silver lining if you smile & act politely! That simple!
Other than the cops, there’s the National Guard (la Guardia) & the same applies, although they may sport scary looking rifles, they’re pretty professional bods. During peak vacation times, citizens may have to put up with 1500 checkpoints (slight exaggeration) on one stretch of road. Traffic will be duly affected, i.e. almost move backwards. You may be required to show your docs at every single checkpoint on your way to Playa El Agua (beats me why everyone feels a need to go there!) & do so again on your way home. Absurd! But keep on smiling...If you do ever need a Lawyer, there’s no shortage, but you’ll probably need a good tip for the right one. Legal processes are a trifle relaxed, Caribbean style, so if you ever do take someone to Court or it happens to you, take it easy, have a Planters, figure on a couple of years or more for due process.

VALUE: (This is about where it should be) Margarita (still is) a high value island. To illustrate the point, a few random examples:
- Our rent back in '88 for a huge colonial house in the capital city of La Asuncion - all of $150 per month.
- Today that may have increased to around $500…..
- A Snapper dinner for two avec wine was to be enjoyed for around $10, & can still be enjoyed for $80 or less today. You can pay more if you really want, but you needn’t!
- Real Estate prices are on average 30% below most other islands’, & even less when compared to St.Cripes & some places limited to Lottery winners only…
- Construction quality is pretty good by any standards!
- Imported or locally assembled vehicles are available tax-free, as are designer rags & most other capital goods.
However...INFLATION & SPECULATION are not unknown phenomena of late, even in Margarita. The days of this being a 'cheap'o-cheap'o' Caribbean island are gone, probably for ever! But then the rest of the world isn't becoming more of a bargain either, is it?!

TAXES: A Freeport of sorts, i.e. imported merchandise has low customs duties to pay & as of writing Margarita is still sales-tax exempt (hurray!!). If you become a resident, you’ll need to complete a simple tax form for registration with the local SENIAT office & if you produce income here, make a once yearly declaration, Taxes are reasonable, be honest & pay any dues & be a good citizen. That simple.

ISLAND BEAUTIES: Both peninsulas are naturally beautiful, there are many miles of solitary sandy beaches, but also some beaches with action a-plenty, which I have not even been near for at least 15 years. Personal preference. If you want to see beauties & I MEAN beautiful anatomies, the choice is fair! I’ll say no more here, there are enough web-sites to entice your rushing to Expedia or some such (they don't pay me for this)…We also have some of the planet’s best windsurf conditions; one can fly from Margarita to Coche Island in the company of international windsurf talent.
I know a few expats who stumbled, I mean really fell for local girls and at last count all seemed quite content. Also know of several instances where folks who had moved here, decided to move on. Never for long though, - they usually backtrack within a few months to a year…

There’s something about this place!

ISLAND EXPLORATION: I couldn’t live on a flat island. I need at least some place to climb, feel temperature variations, breathe different air, see & smell vegetation, wade through a stream, spot some creatures in the wild. Margarita has that. The highest elevation (La Sierra) is only about 3000ft (950m), but it is cool up there and makes for an interesting walk with great views. Other, smaller mountains also invite exploring, no need to feel bored ever!

HISTORY: The old Spanish capital of La Asuncion bears witness to colonial times, as does the port city of Pampatar, several Forts & defensive installations as well as churches & architecture generally. There’s plenty to see & read about, it is an island with history! Cubagua, one of the 3 (4) islands comprising the State of New Sparta (Nueva Esparta), lies half-submerged since 1545. This was Spain’s pearl-diving hub and although there are no ancient buildings left now, part of the old city can still be seen below water. It makes for interesting diving & snorkelling.

MODERN LIFE: I enjoy living in a remote area surrounded by nature with as good a view of the sea as possible, but prefer not to live too close to the sea, not on nor immediately above; and this preference dates from many years before the Pacific Tsunami. It’s probably related to my sailing days, when I saw (& felt) just how quickly and how violently a placid blue lake can turn into a voracious monster.
With maturity there can also manifest itself a wish to at least be within striking distance of some contemporary temptations, like a few good stores, a Tony Roma’s (for want of a healthier example), or a better-type Tandoori (sadly absent!), quite apart from your average open-air-in-the-sand Restaurant serving your average Catch-of-the-Day-in-a-Tamarind sauce…..When less mature (not that long ago) no doubt I would have preferred to both do the catching as well as the cooking, but these days I enjoy to cook & choosing the appropriate White or Burgundy seems like challenge enough.
Hopefully with that point reasonably well made, I’ll say this island offers plenty of good choices & for all ranges of maturity.

A PROJECT: For contentment, one needs the right stimuli, - summits to climb, distances to cover, new ground to chart, leaving one’s footprint where no others may have stood. On a crowded planet these kinds of stimuli are ever more difficult to come by, and their absense one of the contributing reasons for our neurosis, psychosis, depression, ill-health & general discontent. One may only remotely sense the void left by a lack of positive challenges, accentuated by excesses and self-destructive habits as are tobacco, alcohol, drugs & aggressive behaviour.

MARSIANS: Just a word or two about people experiences - The world continually changes! Every day in every way, it seems. More people, more competition, more fear, more aggression, more selfishness, more EGO = LESS quality of life, less Peace, less Honesty ! - My last few experiences with relatively young persons from the 'old Continent' have been sadly, regretfully NEGATIVE and AWFUL. In Venezuela one can learn to become generous, open-heartedly generous, without ulterior (profit or advantage) motive ! What I have witnessed and experienced, especially among Europeans (Northern Europeans) in this case, is a type of mind-set I had almost forgotten existed. Hypocrisy, deviousness, connivance and plain dishonesty !! BAD experiences, that I shall do my best to forget & certainly avoid a repeat of.....
Hence this request: Please only bother to contact me if you truly feel you do NOT like life on Mars or living as a Marsian. Marsian habits are most certainly unwelcome here and I have now developed a new Marsiometer. A highly sensitive instrument, able to measure the level of Marsian contamination anyone may try to cover up, in split seconds!! So please beware! Anti-Marsian self-protective measures will be applied instantly in all cases.

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CARIBBEAN INVESTMENT INTEREST?
I offer 008 BANANA PEEL INSURANCE!

Read the James Bond story on this subject - How to live on a beautiful Caribbean Island for the rest of your life + guaranteed income - with only a small investment! Avoid Banana peels! This serious-fun'n-sun story is a MUST read for anyone considering moving to or buying property in the area. Just $20 could save you a BUNDLE - of which I will DONATE $18 to the UNIVERSAL WAVE ENVIRONMENTAL ORG - for you to receive their wonderful CD - FIRST AMAZON SYMPHONY absolutely at no cost to you!

Order story from me, J.B at: Bonded4@gmail.com

PROFESSIONAL, EXPERT ANALYSIS & ADVICE
available for a reasonable fee!

Interested in moving to Margarita Island? I provide a full professional analysis of the project(s) of interest to you. Criteria include:

- Project value, present & future projected value or possible devaluation!
- Construction type & quality!
- Documentation, i.e. does the property have clear title(s)!
- Location!!!
- Public services! (Electricity, sewage, water supply, phone etc)!
- Accessibility! (Road conditions, expected major road works, sewers etc which can often seriously affect the way you may judge a property)!
- Privacy!! (Common areas, parties, pools, noise levels within complex & surroundings etc)!
- Security!!!! (How safe & secure will you be! Neighbourhood crime, recent statistics, closeness to low-cost housing etc.)!
- General ambiance rating!
- Expected 'contentment factors' & otherwise!
- General observations, that may assist you in making the best choice!

I can also advise & assist you with all your legal status requirements for Venezuela, help you avoid Banana peels & large doses of Aspirin!!

Bonded4@gmail.com

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Escape

Just go.....